one sleepless

A tilted cup placed carefully to stand on it's end. Let it fall, but it's never empty. I claimed I knew it. The answer to your question. But you still felt that lonliness. I didn't believe how weak you were. I wouldn't accept someone who needed me, while I stayed desporate.
What exists under you careful dressed skin... I gave a quick diagnosis, and I was wrong. ...sent you on your way. I sent you unprepared. I sent you towards a trap.
I've failed myself, what I believed. I held your trust until it decayed.. twas fragile. thin. was feeble and decrepid.
Of the 86 meetings, 86 hello's, the 86 touches of the cheek, the 86 long stares, 86 quiet moments......
Of them, 3 mattered, 3 will be remembered by me forever. 3 times you've captured me. 3 times I was speechless, 3 times you were strong. 3 times I felt my skin wasn't there.. would you just hold my heart.
Those 3 times.. I slept. Those 3 times which you were a dream. And only those times! only those 3 times were you so powerful. Only in those times did you deserve the control, did you deserve to take care of me.
That was the last time I saw you. We never said our goodbyes in reality.. but there was never a chance was there?
I'll hold my last emotion I had about you... if not I will never remember what exactly you meant to me.
The dreams they don't come anymore.
But I always had the answer my dearest,
only when you died I knew the question,
"Can I be with you forever?"

by. J.A. Wright